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"Intimate" Violence against Women3 NBS of Julian DrewA Little PregnantA Natural History of RapeA Parent's Guide to Asperger Syndrome and High-Functioning AutismA Stir of BonesAbout a BoyAdult Children of Emotionally Immature ParentsAgainst MarriageAgainst MarriageAlmost a PsychopathAlone TogetherAnatomy of LoveAngelsAnother CountryAnxious ParentsApples and OrangesBe Honest--You're Not That Into Him EitherBeing the Other OneBetrayed as BoysBeyond AddictionBipolar DisorderBoys Will Put You on a Pedestal (So They Can Look Up Your Skirt)Breaking ApartBrief Adolescent Therapy Homework PlannerBringing Up ParentsBut I Love HimCaring for a Child with AutismCaring in Remembered WaysCherishmentChildren of the Aging Self-AbsorbedChildren of the Self-AbsorbedChildren, Families, and Health Care Decision MakingClawsCloserCold HitCoping With Difficult PeopleCouple SkillsCruddyDancing in My NuddypantsDivorce PoisonDoing ItDone With The CryingEcstasyEmotional ClaustrophobiaEmotional Fitness for IntimacyEmotional Intelligence at WorkEntwined LivesErotic PassionsEssentials of Premarital CounselingEvery Pot Has a CoverFacts About ADHD ChildrenFamilies Like MineFamilyFamily BoundFamily FirstFear of IntimacyFinal JeopardyFind MeFlashpointFor Lesbian ParentsForgive Your Parents, Heal YourselfGandhi's WayGeorgia Under WaterGetting over Getting MadGetting the Love You WantGetting the Love You Want Audio CompanionGirl in the MirrorGirl StuffGoing Home without Going CrazyHandbook of AttachmentHandbook of Counseling and Psychotherapy with Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual ClientsHappiness Sold SeparatelyHard to GetHe's Just Not That Into YouHealing ConversationsHollow KidsHot ButtonsHot Chocolate for the Mystical LoverHow Families Still MatterHow to Create Chemistry with AnyoneHow to Give Her Absolute PleasureHow to Handle a Hard-To-Handle KidHow to Keep Your Teenager Out of Trouble and What to Do If You Can'tI am Not Sick I Don't Need Help!I Don't Know How She Does ItI Hate You-Don't Leave MeI Only Say This Because I Love YouI'm OK, You're My ParentsIn the Mood, AgainInside the American CoupleIntrusive ParentingIt's Called a Breakup Because It's BrokenIt's Love We Don't UnderstandJakarta MissingKeeping Passion AliveKeeping Your Child in MindLet's Get This StraightLiberation's ChildrenLife's WorkLikely to DieLove JunkieLove SickLove Times ThreeLove Works Like ThisLoving Someone With Bipolar DisorderLoving Someone with Borderline Personality DisorderLust in TranslationMaking the RunMaking the RunManic DepressionMars and Venus - Starting Over.Mating in CaptivityMom, Dad, I'm Gay.MotherstylesMurder in the InnMysterious CreaturesNecessary NoiseOdd Girl OutOpenOpening to Love 365 Days a YearOphelia's MomOrgasmsOur Journey Through High Functioning Autism and Asperger SyndromeOut of the DustOvercoming Your Difficult FamilyParenting and the Child's WorldParenting on the GoParenting Your Out-Of-Control TeenagerParents and Digital TechnologyParents Do Make a DifferencePassionate MarriagePlanet JanetPreventing Misbehavior in ChildrenProblem Child or Quirky Kid?Raising AmericaRaising ElijahRaising Kids in an Age of TerrorRaising Kids in the 21st CenturyRaising Resilient ChildrenRay's a LaughRelationship RescueRelax, It's Just SexRespect-Me RulesRomantic IntelligenceRoom For JSecrets of a Passionate MarriageSelf-NurtureSelfish, Shallow, and Self-AbsorbedSex Addiction: The Partner's PerspectiveShidduch CrisisSickenedSingleSlut!Socrates in LoveSomeone Like YouSong for EloiseSpecial SiblingsSpiritually Healing the Indigo Children (and Adult Indigos, Too!)Staying Connected to Your TeenagerStaying Sane When Your Family Comes to VisitStop Arguing with Your KidsStop SignsStop Walking on EggshellsStop Walking on EggshellsStrong, Smart, & BoldSummer of the SkunksSurviving a Borderline ParentTaking Charge of AngerTelling SecretsThank You for Being Such a PainThe Anti-Romantic ChildThe AwakeningThe Bastard on the Couch CDThe Birth of PleasureThe Brief Couples Therapy Homework Planner with DiskThe Bully Action GuideThe Burden of SympathyThe Commercialization of Intimate LifeThe CorrectionsThe Couples Psychotherapy Treatment PlannerThe DisappearanceThe Dream BearerThe Educated ParentThe Emotional RevolutionThe Employee Assistance Treatment PlannerThe EpidemicThe Ethics of ParenthoodThe Ethics of the FamilyThe Gay Baby BoomThe Good DivorceThe Guide for International Intercultural Couples and Families Intercultural MarriageThe Healing Journey for CouplesThe Hostile HospitalThe Husbands and Wives ClubThe Inside Story on Teen GirlsThe Introvert AdvantageThe Little FriendThe Love HexagonThe Moral Intelligence of ChildrenThe Neuroscience of Human RelationshipsThe New I DoThe Normal OneThe Nurture AssumptionThe OASIS Guide to Asperger SyndromeThe Other ParentThe Philosophical ParentThe Psychology of Parental ControlThe Real Rules for GirlsThe Reflective ParentThe Right to Be ParentsThe Secret Lives of WivesThe Spider and the BeeThe State of AffairsThe StepsThe Story of My FatherThe Velveteen FatherThe Virgin BlueThe Visitation HandbookThe Whole ChildTo Have and To Hurt:Two Is EnoughUnderstanding MarriageUnderstanding the Borderline MotherUnhitchedUntrue Up in FlamesWe've Got IssuesWhat about the KidsWhat Goes UpWhat Is Secular Humanism?What It Means to Love YouWhat Our Children Teach UsWhen a Parent is DepressedWhen Mars Women DateWhen Someone You Love Is BipolarWhen Someone You Love Is DepressedWhy Are You So Sad?Will You, Won't You?WomanWorking With Emotional IntelligenceWorried All the TimeYes, Your Teen Is Crazy!
Unlike most parenting books which present at
best a mix of contradictory messages and conflicting advice, Sclafani offers a
refreshing view with practical advice for the concerned, engaged adult
concerned with parenting their child(ren) from infancy to adolescence. Grounded
in an appropriate research literature of the educational and social sciences,
Sclafani's 10 chapters negotiate the practical parenting territory by
addressing many of the shortcomings of earlier volumes dealing with this topic
(often successfully so). Much of the earlier discussion chapters trace the etiology
of modern parenting concerns, stemming from what Sclafani calls 'good enough'
parenting (an observation akin to what I call the 'outsourcing' of our more
traditional parenting responsibilities), but the work continues to address
these concerns with scholarly seriousness, avoiding the temptation to write a "Parenting
for Dummies"-like text. Although dealing in some detail with specific,
separate chapters concerned with fatherhood, motherhood, daycare and special
needs children (for examples), Sclafani remains consistent throughout, in his
attempt to instruct/educate parents in a considerate manner, taking pains to
accommodate a diversity of attitudes, socioeconomic factors and family
lifestyle choices. Indeed, this volume has to be one of the best that I have
read in this regard, and the author certainly cannot be accused of pushing any
particular socio-political agenda in search of proposals for action. In
contrast, Sclafani's posture is firmly situated in his reading of some of the
most significant (albethey selective) findings of past and present
socio-developmental and educational research. Perhaps one of the finest
contributions of this text is its timely reminder to the reader of the role of
parents as teachers. Whereas many authors try to merely advise parents
how to better interact with their child(ren)'s teachers, Sclafani revisits the
ways in which parents may themselves 'take back' this role for themselves --
the results of so doing thereafter giving rise to a more sustainable, active
family household (of the type most of us claim to prefer, if not only rarely
enjoy on a daily basis !). We read in this book not only some very plausible
explanations as to how many parents have become so relatively 'disengaged', if
not actually dissatisfied, with our parenting skills, but are also guided
through some thought-provoking material which can lead the reader to better
plan (and hopefully implement) their interactive parenting behaviour throughout
their child(ren)'s formative years through to adolescence, with care and
consistency. Other special topic sections included in this book will be of
interest to some, but not all, readers (e.g., those dealing with relocation,
divorce or step-parenting), but each is dealt with in the same erudite,
informed way. If I were to raise an issue with the author, nevertheless, I
remain somewhat puzzled by the latter chapters dealing with bodily impairments,
illness and bereavement. These sections were rather incomplete in my view, and
left the reviewer turning to the references for more guidance -- and in this
sense, the volume ends rather abruptly, and without returning to the living
world of parenting as a fun and exciting adventure as discussed earlier.
However, if I were asked right now to recommend only a single, comprehensive
volume as a reference for parents setting out to equip and educate themselves
with regards their planning for the 'better parenting' of their child(ren),
this would be that book.
© 2006 Tony Dickinson
Dr. Tony Dickinson, PIC (Asia)
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